This is for those who have decided to label me a floater. You can call me that if you like, but there's something you should understand. First and foremost, just because I may prefer being far from home doesn't mean I don't love my family and friends. It doesn't mean that I'm afraid of settling down. it doesn't mean that I am unwilling to put in the hard work to start a "normal" career. It doesn't mean I'm a child refusing to take the step into adulthood.

We all know the negative connotations that come with being labeled a "floater." A floater can't stay put, can't commit, can't live authentically. You think I don't take life seriously. Well that's okay, just know you're all wrong. Taking life seriously is exactly why I need to "float" around. Life is too short to not listen to what your essence needs to survive. To all you who prefer the stable life, who need to be in your comfort bubble, listen to your soul and live that life. It's just not for me. That life chips away at my being, it breaks my spirit. It's a life I'm not ready to lead. I thrive off of discomfort, I thrive off of the unknown. Uncertainty breeds calm. This is the challenge I need. I don't want to be lying in my death bed wondering what could've been. I must do all I can to live for my dreams.

Dreams. Most people seem to believe that dreams are only made up of money, careers, cars, and other material goods. Sure I studied and talked of wanting to be a film star, but it's not my dream. Not right now. What's my dream? My dream is to always live the life that's truest to myself. I need to ride around a foreign countryside on a motorbike as it's soundtracked by my music. I need to stand at the top of hills and mountains and gaze out over a new world. I need to meet those people I would never encounter back at home. I need to chase exotic love. I dream of waking up in the morning to the sight of an angel starring back at me, whether it be only for that brief moment of paths crossing or something longer. That is what I live for. This is what I know i'll find. I want to see what you all read in stories on the internet or in books. Fantasizing while watching the Travel Channel just doesn't cut it for me. I can't just take someone else's word for it. I have to experience it. It's the only way I'll continue to grow into who I want to be. It's my only way to reach that mysterious self-realization.


Orange County is not for me. In this place, I begin to fall back into what I once was, what I never want to be again. It's a terrifying thought that tortures me day in and day out. Regression. I can't allow it. My adventure will continue. The realization that it's just months away brings tranquility to my days. It overwhelms me with peace. The light at the end of the tunnel has shown itself. I finally have my way out of my parent's home. The only way is through the heart, the part of all of us that we must listen to. Life is too short to ignore it, lest you wish to spend your final days in this world wondering what could've been.